With the temper tantrum of a few weeks ago, I've been reading and rereading books for strategies on dealing with him. One thing that seems to be helping is making a real effort to get him into bed at a decent time. I'm now giving both kids a bath more or less at the same time. Meg loves to lay on the sling and kick the water while Andy likes to make birthday cake with the cups. It's a pleasant enough way to spend 20 minutes and then Andy can sit in the tub by himself for a bit while I get Meg dressed and ready for bed.
I'm also trying to not go in to him as much at night. His room is right near ours so if he cries out for one of us, he's loud and hard to ignore, but we're working on it. And if we do go it, it's not to cuddle, it's to quickly fix something (find a binky, covers, etc.) and leave without fanfare. The theory is that if it's not fun, he'll lose interest. A work in progress, but it helps to be trying something.
The funny thing about the sleep thing is now he's waking up to go pee. It's great and a positive step, but I find him getting up to pee in the morning is often before he would have liked to get up so he's tired when he wakes up. It's something we're all going to have to adjust to, but I am so proud of him for getting up out of bed and doing it himself. He's really catching on (fingers crossed).
I'm also working to give him more control. Instead of offering him two spoons or cups to choose from, I've put all his stuff in a drawer in the kitchen. Then if he complains he doesn't like something, I tell him to get another one. I'm also working to redirect him if he complains, which sometimes works. So if he complains that he wants X, Y or Z, I tell him to go get it (within reason, of course, the wine is mine).
Meg is just a darling. She isn't rolling over yet, but she sure can arch her back and kick her legs, like she might want to. Right now it's great to know I can put her down and she won't go anywhere. I know that won't last long. She's now usually going to bed around 9ish and waking up 6:30ish with a wake up call in the night sometime between 2 and 4. For me, it's great to just have an hour or so to myself before bed to relax without either one of them.
And speaking retraining, I'm going back to work in two weeks. On the one hand, it will be nice to be with adults for part of the day and do something other than clean diapers and do laundry, but I'm starting to get a little anxious about it. I'm overall better than I was before I went back after Andy, but I can still feel it. When I start to get worked up, I just remind myself that if it doesn't work, we'll change it. Nothing has to be forever. My plan is to work four half days through May and then go back to four full days a week starting in June. I'm hopeful the half days will help us used to a new routine at a new daycare with two kids. I like that the new daycare is just a mile away -- that will certainly make it easier if we forget something.